The Answers to the Questions on Your Mind

Liz (this link only works if you are her friend on blogger) asked me these five questions because this is a blog-game thingie. If you'd like me to ask you five questions, post a comment.

1. What characteristic about yourself do you wish more people would notice?

Hmm... I guess it is hard to know the difference between what people notice but don't react to and what they don't notice at all, but laying that distinction aside, I wish more people would notice that I am really, truly, exceptionally good-looking. A lot of people just don't seem to see that, somehow.

Ok, joking aside. I guess I wish more people would notice that I am shy. I think most people miss this because I have a good deal of self-confidence in a very insular way, and can readily engage someone just as soon as they are friendly to me, but as far as initiating the first friendliness goes, I have trouble, and I believe this shyness makes some people think I am aloof and stuck-up.


2. Can elitism be a good thing?

I just heard a piece on NPR the other day about the word "elitism" and how it has become one of those meaningless words that people use in far more situations than it applies to. However, we can explore several definitions.

If elitism means assuming your kind of person is better than all other peoples and therefore belittling others without your same qualities, thinking you deserve to have more privileges or take things away from other people because you are more important, then no, it is never a good thing.

If elitism means narrowing your scope to only one kind of person and one kind of lifestyle and one set of values and failing to take any other set of variables or beliefs into consideration then no, it is never a good thing.

But if elitism means holding yourself to a higher set of standards and trying to achieve levels of accomplishment most people never even aspire to, much less reach, then yes, it can be a good thing. The elite used to be a class of people who were admired and respected because they had risen above the common man. I think too many people these days think being mediocre is the best way to be. The catch - elitism only remains good if the elite never forget those unlike them, and manage not to become conceited about their accomplishments.


3. Do you think that certain people are born more blessed/lucky than others, or do all people create their own circumstances?

Some of both. Some people are born into the most dismal circumstances and manage to rise up and out of it anyway, and become more than anyone would have ever anticipated. Some people are given everything but make nothing of themselves. Most of us fall somewhere in between. I think on a day-to-day level, we make our own luck. I truly believe it is my decision most of the time whether to have a good day or a bad day. If someone is rude to me, it is my choice whether or not to take it personally and let it get under my skin. However, this only works to a certain degree. If, say, my horse died, I'd have a bad day. Period. And I think it is important to engage with my life to a degree that some things do mean so much to me that they can't just roll off my back. However, some people seem to hit those kinds of stumbling blocks constantly, over the course of their entire lives - big, bad luck beyond their control - death, illness, war, etc.. And certainly, we can still choose how to navigate through the huge tragedies, but some people do seem to get the short end of the stick as far as how often they are challenged.


4. You have to sacrifice one: writing or visual art. What do you choose and why?

Well, you know how to hit where it hurts, but I would give up visual art - mainly because getting my BFA really taught me that I am a better writer than I am an artist. I am an okay artist, I think, but I believe I am a good writer, and while I am a genius in neither, my writing gets closer to the core of me than my art does. I can commit to and focus on writing in a way I can't with art and while in my visual endeavors I am always trying to figure out what I'm trying to say, with writing it all comes together without any real effort on my part. Frankly, visual art is a bit of struggle - writing is as easy as pie. I think that means something.


5. What is the most important thing you know about yourself?

I know that I am one of the elite. Haha, just kidding. Okay, seriously, I know that I am prone to withdrawing and living too much in my own head. It is important for me to structure my life so I have responsibilities that force me to get out into the world, because I won't do it on my own. If I am given the vague choice on any given day, go do something, or don't go do something, I will always choose not to go. So, I have to replace the "something" with a thing that I love. Brian is great at rooting me out and making me put on real clothes and leave the house. Steen is also a big motivator as far as this goes. Also, committing to things in advance so that I will let people down if I back out at the last minute is always a sure-fire way to break me out of my stasis. I think I could easily become very eccentric and a little scary if I didn't keep this in mind.

Visiting and Visited

We are back from our brief dash back to AZ with my brother in tow. Although Brian and I have both had to abandon him for work daily, he seems be bearing up fairly well. We have so far spent our evenings relaxing and drinking Oktoberfest, which is pretty hard to beat. He also came out to the barn and got a number of really great photos of Steen, which are viewable on my other blog.

Winter appears to be setting in here with more earnest since our return. We have had days in the 40's and chill, drizzly rain. Not the most ideal weather under any circumstances. I'll be glad when the rain turns to snow, so at least we can ski.

In work news, I unframed an original Rembrandt intaglio print yesterday from the 1620's. That was unbelievable/nerve-wracking. I really need to start keeping a list of famous artworks that I handle. So far I know I've got Durer, Rivera, Pollack, Warhol, and now Rembrandt, but there were a few other famous pieces I worked on at the museum that I've forgotten. Still, not a bad start.

Rings

Brian and I got our engagement rings yesterday. We ordered plain silver bands for Rio Grande Jewelry Supply to get a feel for size and shape so we can better design our own custom wedding bands when the time comes. I put my "practice" ring on yesterday afternoon and went immediately to the barn. I haven't worn any ring at all for many years, and never one on this finger (obviously) and it feels very strange. It continually intruded itself on my attention while I drove, but while I was working with Steen I forgot about it entirely, so I take that as a good sign. Brian is going through a similar adjustment, and last night at dinner we were both unconsciously fidgeting with them constantly. Still, I imagine we will get used to them before long.

Anyway, I'm going to do my best not to turn this into a wedding blog (and not to turn my life into one never-ending wedding drama), so I may be silent on this subject for a while. Thanks for all the heartfelt good wishes we have received!

Yes

A beautiful afternoon in the park, some cucumber sandwiches, and the nicest port I've ever had in my life. Of course, I'd have agreed to marry Brian no matter how he asked, but when he pulled out that bottle and proposed, I agreed without the slightest hesitation.

Kids These Days

On Monday I ended up having a brief conversation with a 19-year-old boy. Clearly, this person thinks of himself as an adult, yet I could not quite take him seriously as he regaled me with tales that highlighted his bull-riding prowess and talent for drinking his friends under the table. I feel I'd have found myself similarly torn between amusement and discomfort had I been approached by a five-year-old proud of his ability to draw whiskers on people's faces with an eyeliner pencil and burp the alphabet. I spent the conversation hoping to avoid any demonstrations, and wanting to say, "I've no doubt you're awfully cool, but these just aren't skills that I value."