Headline: Buzzing Tenant Evicted After Notable Failure to "Keep it Down"

JOHNSON COUNTY, IA: After a few days of rocky co-habitation, a local conflict ended this morning when Robin S-, resident of Iowa City, evicted a large house-fly from the upstairs office of her home. The house, which S- occupies with fiance Brian D-, has already dealt with several conflicts of the human-insect variety, and its history of resolving these tensions employing diplomacy over violence has become somewhat legendary.

However, "Everybody has a limit," S- is quoted saying, mid-morning on Nov. 17^th, shortly after the eviction took place. "It's not like we didn't warn [the fly]." This is true, authorities verify. Just a few days ago D- reportedly said to the fly, as it buzzed against a window, "Hey, keep it down up there." (Though there is some confusion here as some evidence has indicated D- thought he was talking to a lady-bug, for which the house has a particular soft-spot.)

When asked about her feelings on the outcome of the conflict, S-, after expressing relief, said sadly, "It didn't have to end this way. But this morning the fly continued to knock repeatedly against the windowpane while I was trying to work, which was very distracting. Then after I took a shower and sat back down, it just came crawling right at me across the desk. That was the final straw." When asked if the fly's manner was violent in this moment, S- hesitated and finally clarified, "Not violent, but it was decidedly creepy."

Authorities agree S- was "within her rights" when she acted quickly on this final transgression, and using a New Yorker magazine and a 1999 Cactus Cup mug usually used to hold pens, trapped the fly without injuring it and took it outdoors, where it reportedly fell into the dead leaves in the yard.

A neighbor, who prefers to remain anonymous, sympathized with the S-D household, saying, "Sometimes this street can be pretty noisy, and it gets to you. It is only fair that some of these disruptive citizens face the consequences of their actions. I just hope that fly doesn't get into my house, now."

The fly has not been able to be reached for a comment.